I'm sure some, or all, of you are puzzled by the title of my blog post.
You may have even read it a second time and thought,
If your reaction to me asking, "How's your mental health?" is less-than-overjoyed, then good. That's kind of what I'm going for. ;)
May is Mental Health Awareness Month.
Were you aware?
If not, now you are. :)
My instinct is to write a novel as long as all the Harry Potter books combined on this topic.
I feel there's so much I need and want to say to make my point, but luckily for you I'll keep it short(er than the first Harry Potter book at least.)
So, back to business. Other than me, when was the last time a doctor, stranger, close friend or family member said,
"Hey, how's your mental health been lately? Been feeling alright? Anything you want to talk about?"
... or even ...
"Hey -- I know it's been a stressful time for you lately with working three jobs and having a baby and losing a family member and finishing college, (etc. etc. etc.) Can I chat with you about how you've been doing and do something to help lighten your load?"
If you have no history of diagnosed mental illness, or even if you do have mental illness in your history, you would definitely be in the minority if you answered yes to that question.
As a loving friend and member of an amazing family, I certainly know I haven't asked anyone that question lately.
Because...
What if they're totally fine and they think I'm crazy for asking such a weird question?
Or maybe they'd think I was just being nosy.
Or maybe they'd think I don't know them well enough to ask such a personal question.
Or maybe they'd be offended and think I think something's wrong with them.
Or maybe I would ask that question and they'd never speak to me again.
Okay, I know that's a little extreme -- but often those are the lies we tell ourselves that keep us from reaching out to people in our lives who do desperately need help.
Although I've used all of those excuses before -- the thing that keeps nagging at my heart is, what if they're not totally fine? What if they do need someone to talk to? What if they're feeling lost and confused and don't know where to turn?
As much as medicine and understanding of mental illness is growing, suicide rates are climbing.
We have more and more treatment options for mentally ill people, so you'd think these horrific statistics would be showing positive signs of change.
I think sometimes it's just easier to assume everyone is doing great and feeling great and that the smile on their face is genuine.
It hurts to dig a little deeper and discover that someone's not as happy as they appear on the surface. But, you could end up being a light during a dark time for them. You can make a difference by being courageous and taking a minute to ask a question.
To anyone reading who needs someone to talk to, please know I would be honored if you chose to talk to me. I have been there and know how lonely it feels, but I can tell you no matter what your circumstances are or how you feel, there is hope. Everything changes when you get the courage to speak up and get help.
To anyone reading who's offended by this post or disagrees with the severity of mental illness, or perhaps thinks people should just "snap out of it," please read the following message:
Couldn't have said it any better.
xo,
Emily
