When I post little notes about having trouble choosing where we want to go on vacation or having a long day at work, I'm not complaining. I do realize we could have far harder decisions to make and obstacles to overcome -- and throughout our lives and marriage we have had struggles and confusion far greater than anything I've written about on here.
One of my favorite quotes is,
"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." (Plato)
I heard a song on the radio today, and the lyrics reminded me of my personal struggle this past year.
It was "I Need A Miracle" by Third Day. If you haven't heard it, you should listen to it. :)
The chorus goes:
"Well no matter who you are and no matter what you've done
There will come a time when you can't make it on your own
And in your hour of desperation
Know you're not the only one
Prayin', "lord above, I need a miracle."
There will come a time when you can't make it on your own
And in your hour of desperation
Know you're not the only one
Prayin', "lord above, I need a miracle."
If you know me, you know this past year has been a rollercoaster. If you don't know me, it's no secret. I've been a Christian for as long as I can remember, but I never fathomed there would be a 'time when I couldn't make it on my own.' I believed in God but never felt like I had to fully depend on Him for everything.
As a society, we're taught to be self-sufficient and strong and persevere -- and so often when we get through tough times, we say 'Wow I am amazing that I got through that all by myself.'
We're told over and over that we can do anything, and are told that we hold all the power over our lives. But nothing could be further from the truth. After going through a situation where I knew I only had a small amount of control, and the rest was up to God, I've learned that even in the small, trivial challenges of life I'm not making it through them because I'm strong - God is blessing me by helping me through them.
Like this song says -- inevitably -- that 'hour of desperation' did come for me, even though I thought it never would. And I felt like I truly was the only one who had ever felt that way and prayed that prayer. I was so used to "depending on myself" for everything that when I was no longer able to do that, I had no idea how to put my complete trust in God.
It took that 'hour of desperation' for me to realize it is not me on my own ever getting through anything. I don't deserve any of the credit. Every struggle I overcome is a miracle from God.
